::my past, present, and future::

i miss them (what they are doing right now? hope for the best for each of them)




this is where i am right now...FSTEP (i am pleased to know them)

this is my imagination towards my future (the future still a mystery)

::sihat vs sakit::

sepanjang minggu lepas, hari2 saya tidak begitu indah:-

saya mengalami:-

1.headache
2.backache
3.heartache4.can't sleep 5.cannot breath properly (not all the time la)6.sakit kaki


adakah itu petanda saya sedang mengalami stress??!!?

*harap minggu ini sahaja saya begini

::saya sakit jiwa TAPI bukan gila::

AAAAARRRGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!
this past few days...i am not in a good mood
i hate to be like this
hate it so much!!!

::a step at FSTEP

lets photo speaks for itself

::missing someone very badly::

I REALLY miss u…miss u damn much,
Don’t you MISS me?
It's almost 2 month…
we were not smsing each other,

It’s seems like you don’t care about ME...
about THEM...
about US anymore,

Are you REALLY HATE me? Hate them?
I know, you are probably HATE me the most!coz I am the ONLY one who should be blamed

Am I really a BETRAYER?

Am I really that BAD?

Tell ME,
what am I suppose to do…to make sure everything will be back to normal,

Please…!!



*SORRY for the lousy English.

::kesedihan melanda::

...kucing saya mati...

='(

..sedih sangat..

::apakah itu TAGGED kawan-kawan::

alamak!!
...saya di TAGGED oleh karen...

Directions: Once you’ve been tagged, you have to write a blog with 16 random things, facts, habits or goals about you. At the end choose 16 people to be tagged, listing their names and why you chose them. Don’t forget to leave them a comment or tag them in your note to read this

1. sangat pemalu.. extremly



2. susah nak membezakan antara kiri dan kanan... selalu ada problem bila nak tunjuk arah bila jadi co-pilot....mesti susah time nk ambik lesen memandu nanti, huhu



3. Hobi masa lapang gigit kuku [dah lama tak guna kepit kuku...serius]


4. Fanatik terhadap apa2 sahaja yang berkaitan dengan jepun,korea or taiwan…. terutama drama or film diorang. Sometimes, mood akan jadi baik bila dapat tengok drama or movie diorang sehinggakan sampai terbawak-bawak dalam kehidupan seharian


5. phobia belajar english... belajar japanese language lagi senang daripada belajar english language ...Terasa english susah sangat...mungkin sebab pernah kena lempang ngan cikgu english masa darjah dua dulu kot


6. Boleh melantak apa sahaja. Tapi kalu diberi pilihan tak suka makan ketam dan udang. KETAM: Masa kecik2 pernah makan seperiuk ketam busuk, so dah jadi phobia sampai sekarang....UDANG: Kalau nak makan udang mesti terbayang ulat kayu (warna putih) sebab masa kecik2 dulu suka main kat batang kayu reput


7. Gayat di tempat tinggi, takut nak dekat dengan air sungai/tasik/kolam yang kita tak nampak dasarnya…terbayang ada raksasa air yang akan tangkap kita, takut gelap, takut jarum [fear factor aku terlalu banyak untuk disenaraikan]


8. lebih geli pada ulat bulu, beluncas, ulat sampah, ulat buah, ulat daun atau apa2 jenis ulat (larva) berbanding lipas atau katak. [Geli sampai tengok gambar ulat2 tu pun terasa lain macam]


9. Sangat suka berangan2 [Hidup seolah2 di alam fantasi]


10. Keyakinan di tahap yang paling minimum. Susah untuk membinanya tapi mudah untuk dimusnahkan oleh orang lain [tengah berusaha untuk meningkatkannya ke tahap maximum]


11. Sudah hampir mencecah 24 tahun tapi tak pernah ada couple [Dah nasib badan]


12. Selalu menganggap dunia ini indah, aman dan makmur [padahal, realitinya, hancur]


13. Easy to fall in luv tapi susah untuk meluahkan terutama pada orang yang berkenaan [Lebih suka memendam walaupun tahu ianya amat menyeksakan jiwa raga]


14. ...If I like someone, I will ignore him. pura2 tiada apa2 [tak nak dia tahu aku suka kat dia....malu siot]


15. dulu saya tidak suka senyum...sebab kakak saya kata saya senyum macam kucing tapi sekarang lantaklah apa orang nak kata...kucing tu kan comel =)


16. Tidak boleh orang meninggi suara kat aku, mesti darah menyirap time tu jugak [aku sebenarnya susah nak marah]...siaplah!!

...and orang2 yang saya mahu tagged pulak ialah, YOU16kali...
so, kepada sesiapa yang melawat blog saya ni...andalah orangnya!!

::why I hate ENGLISH::

Nowadays, ENGLISH is crucial.

For example, in FSTEP, I should speak ENGLISH with all my colleagues and staffs because in FSTEP area, everybody is not allowed to speak others than ENGLISH. Actually, it’s good because FSTEP try to encourage its entire participant to converse well in ENGLISH especially for those people whose lack of confident like me.

ENGLISH classes under British Council which are provided by FSTEP are compulsory to all its participants. So, it’s an opportunity for me to improve my ENGLISH.

My ENGLISH panel, Mr. George Chong encourage us to keep practicing speak ENGLISH all the time.

So, I chose Sunday, Monday, Wednesday and Friday as my ENGLISH days. I already told my friends to speak or text me in ENGLISH during my ENGLISH days. And I also encourage them to give an advice if I do a mistake when I text or speak to them. It’s embarrassing. I should learn ENGLISH though.

Anyway, I had a difficulty to learn ENGLISH. It’s seemed like ENGLISH and me are not mend to be together. Is that true??

There is a story behind all this.

Note: MY STORY

Why I hate to learn English…

I would like to tell you guys about one story of mine. Maybe it is less important than yours but I just want to share it. Mind to share?

Anyway, title of my-so-call-story is ‘Rosmawar and Its poor English’.

Why I hate English so much?

It’s due to a bad experienced of learning ENGLISH that I had. I called it bad experience because that incident created phobia into my life….and until now, I trying hardly to overcome it. It’s such a terrible experience that I have to go trough.

The story begins…

A few years ago….back to 1992
It’s happened during my primary school life. At that moment, I was in standard two…just a little small girl right.
I was live in a small village that I am proudly call it as ‘US’ a short form for Ulu Sepetang. It is a nice village with a friendly peoples live there including me,hahaha….it’s sound seems sarcastic!

Ulu Sepetang it’s a village where almost 90 per cent of its populations is Malay. So, my life was surroundings by Malay culture and people who normally proudly speak of our mother tongue language.

One day…I went to school as usual.

Yesterday was a last day for my English teacher, Khairiah Chik in my school. She was transferred to other school. I was so sad because she was a very lovely teacher. She was kind to her students.

Anyway,

Today, my class will get a new teacher. I’m afraid, how was she is. My other school mates always call her as a ‘singa’….Is it true?

It is time for my English class. That day, my new teacher comes in. Her name is Ms. Chua. She entered my classroom and straight to the teacher’s table, without a smiled on her face. Oh my Gosh!

My classmates and I give a welcoming greeting as usual. “Good Morning Teacher!”

“Have a seat,” she said seriously.

The first sessions, she asked us to introduce ourselves one by one. She want to know our names.

After that, she started to teach us.

Ms. Chua wrote some sentences on the blackboard.

A few minutes later, she looked at us and called someone name to come in front and try to answer those questions.

“Rosmawar….try to answer these questions.”

Oh God! She called out my name. “Mati aku…”

I feel nervous. Only God knows what inside me.

I’m stand up. Then, slowly walk to the blackboard. I pick a ‘kapur’ then started guessing answers for each questions.

It’s takes time. Very difficult!

“Rosmawar…quickly! Don’t waste time..” She started to push me.

So, I just guess the answer quickly and write it out on the blackboards.

Suddenly, she came to me and slapped my face. She slapped me in front of my fellow friends.

The class was in a silent mode. Everybody look at me and our new teacher, Ms. Chua quietly.

I touched my cheeck, its hurt.

I was shocked. I’m only an 8 years old village-Malay-students. What she expected from me.

“Are you stupid? These questions are easy enough….itu pun tak boleh nak jawab ke!” She said angrily.

“Okay! Who knows the answer?”

Everybody looked down, just see the floor. Just to note. In a polite way, I am one of the best students in my class.

“Don’t tell me, nobody knows the answer…!”

And, started from that day…I have a difficulty to learn ENGLISH. I’m lack of confident to converse and to ask a question when it’s come to ENGLISH. I’m afraid if I will do a mistake again. So, as a result, I will keep it to myself and pretend that I understand all the time.

For me, it is much easier to learn Japanese than ENGLISH.

So, please help me…Help me to improve my ENGLISH by giving a constructive comment, please =)

::NEW layout::

pfffttttt....

currently feeling bored to view myONLYown blog...heh!!

what happend to me??!!??

nothing,

just getting bored with my current layout, maybe [chocolate and green in color]

::my old layout::

=(

So,

thinking of to change it...

startd browsing at 'the cutest blog on the blogs' website for a new layout...

*browsing, browsing and browsing*

its take too long for me to choose the best, something that suit me...

because there are a lot of beautiful layouts out there...so RAMBANG mata,huhuhu..

*browsing again and again*

getting tired already,

and I thought to chose it randomly...more easier for me,no need to think hard

maybe will change it again...later,

and now...

this is my new layout looks like,

::my current layout::

So...hows?

::headache::

Adoiiii...

*sakit kepala*

*rasa mau muntah*

*pening*